Crushed Yet Not Forgotten

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted”

Psalm 34:18

Walking in a shell of worldly existence with a heart hardened by our response to circumstances that have treated us none to kindly, we create a façade of “everything is all right,” afraid to expose the realness of the pain we feel inside, or the numbness of non-existent emotion encapsulated far beneath the surface.  We “feel” that we cannot feel the reality around us, wanting only to lash out at the very feeling for which we desperately long—love and its tenderness, affection and its luring stroke of calmness on our spirit.  But does a rock feel the brush of a feather against its coarseness or does a calloused foot understand the softness of cotton underneath its step?  With layers of protection armored to survive, we have chosen on our own accord to inflict this insensitivity upon ourselves, thinking mindlessly from the torment of our own self-pity, that we cannot bear to tolerate that which is our only salvation, a crushed spirit.

  It is not until we fully accept, with total abandonment, that Christ will save us from ourselves, that the mighty Winepress must squeeze out our very existence that He created, leaving behind the shell that kept us from experiencing His eternal life.  New wine is made and new wineskins must be used as a vessel for this new man or woman, the old discarded, useless and dead.¹  We must first die before we can live, and we must experience the crushing of our “self” spirit to embrace His spirit anew.²  God does the crushing.  He is there every step it takes, for as long as it takes to make the new wine.  Jesus has not forgotten you.  As the Good Shepherd that He is, the lost sheep is sought after, not one shall be destroyed.³

  You must take the first step.  Break away from your rebellion, your insistence to rely on your façade, your shell, and your armor to survive, and be vulnerable to His love that, once you accept Him, can penetrate to your core.  Let the molten mass of tears erupt as He purges your innermost being, the good wine awaiting His harvest, “for He saves those who are crushed in spirit.”⁴

   

1. Matthew 9:17 NIV
2. 1 Corinthians 15:22
3. Luke 15:4-7
4. Revelations 14:14-16, Psalm 34:18 italics added

Excerpt from A Spiritual Diary, copyright © April 20, 2004 by Jeff Cambridge