Welcome friends on my new journey. I am pursuing “The Creative Way – A Course In Transformational Fiction” authored by the best-selling author, Ted Dekker. The course is enlightening, and the questions posed to me offer answers that I feel are worthy of publication. I am an author of transformational fiction, stories written that change the lives of my readers. I pose the following question and open myself to you with my raw answer. I am speaking from my heart.
“If Apostle Paul is right, and you have been glorified and are complete; if Jesus was right and you are the light of the world and that in the light there is no darkness…have you ever felt like that you? How often are you aware of your true identity, as the one in whom there is no fear or darkness?”1
It is not surprising, and it is amazing at the same time that this question would be posed to me directly after my spiritual journey to Black Mountain, North Carolina. As I left the India Room at the Green Cottage, I stopped to look into the mirror. I do not do this often except in the morning before I shower to see what my morning face looks like, only to see if it looks as haggard as I feel. Rarely, does it appear this way. I may look in the mirror to see if my clothes look right, but I do not look in the mirror to study myself. We should study ourselves, but not our external appearance that we see with our physical eyes. You should see yourself through your inner eye, your spiritual eye, the light within you that dispels all darkness.
I said to the image of me in the mirror, “You are fearless.”
As I reflect on that now after meditating on Ted Dekker’s “Who Is Writing Your Story,” I know that it was my true identity speaking to me because I am one with Christ. The Spirit spoke those words, but I am one with the Spirit, so then, it was me speaking to the costume I was wearing that morning, an outdoorsman dressed to hike, to where I did not know, but I would find out as I submitted to God’s will for my day. I ended up trekking to Looking Glass Rock instead of Rattlesnake Mountain that I found on the topographical map nearby Black Mountain. How like God is it for my Father to lead me to a place to look at myself deeply, in the mirror through the window to my soul, to my inner eye, the spiritual one that sees the Light within me, the light of the Holy Spirit.
Have I ever felt like that me, the one who is glorified and complete, the one who is the light of the world and that in the light there is no darkness? For a moment, I did, as I looked in the mirror. But then, that moment became my day, then evening, and finally, my night. Yet, it did not end. I took that feeling, that recognition that I was fearless in Christ - I am one with Him - back to Indiana where I live. I do not call it home any longer. A shift in my perception of my identity occurred while at Black Mountain. God called me there for a divine purpose, a divine encounter with Him…and me. I found me within my concept of God, but it is no longer an idea, a philosophical perspective. It is real. I am one with Christ, and He is one with me. He is all in all, and I am part of all.
How often am I aware of my true identity, in which there is no fear or darkness? I was at work, and it was a slow day, so I listened to Ted Dekker’s audio on “Who Is Writing Your Story.” A customer interrupted my study, and I began to work again. Suddenly, a dark thought of fear crept in my mind. What if? And the story in my mind changed from light to darkness. Fear began to creep in very subtly. Soon, I was embracing negative and fearful thoughts and running with it. I cast them away, but when I left work, my mind clear of responsibilities, the wave of fear came full ashore. The sandcastle of my faith was swept away.
On my way home from work, I stopped at the boat ramp leading to Flat Rock River. I watched the river flow in front of me, the fast moving water inches from my feet. These words crossed my mind, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.”2 The Spirit spoke to me, or I spoke the words to myself, for I am one with the Spirit of God. I immediately realized that my faith is not a sandcastle; it is built on the Rock of Jesus. No power can overcome the power of God, and He reminded me of His promise. When you are a son or daughter of the Father, all of the promises of His Word are yours. Fear was dispelled, and I realized that my thoughts of fear were not from God, they were not from my true identity as a son of the Father. Would my heavenly Father plant a thought of fear in me? No, it was a trick of the devil that twisted the lesson that I listened to about the costumes we wear, our roles in life such as mine as a dad or a pharmacist. Our costumes are our earthly vessel that will pass with time, but our identity will live forever as a son or daughter of the Father. Our costumes and life story are just sandcastles. At some point, they will be washed away.
So, back to the question, “How often am I aware of my true identity, in which there is no fear or darkness?” I am aware of it all the time, yet in my human nature, I do experience fear and darkness. It is my awareness that I am a son of the Father and that I am an heir of Christ, my Brother, which causes the Light to pierce the darkness and fear are dispelled.
Imagine you are in an entirely dark room. You light a candle. That single flame of light pierces the darkness, and you can see. That is all it takes to dispel darkness and fear, to be able to see the Light. Now, take the Light within you, even if it is just a single flame and add to it the dead branches of your past. See, how the Light consumes the darkness of your past, a bonfire of epic proportions?
You are the light of the world. You are a son or daughter of the Father, brother to Christ, and one with the Trinity, the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Carpe diem.
References:
1. “The Creative Way – A Course In Transformational Fiction,” Ted Dekker
2. Isaiah 43:2 NIV
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